So here´s the update on my week in Ecuador....
Oh, and not to disappoint - the Jungle also had some fun and games, but more on that later....
Firstly, our ¨esteemed (not!) leader¨ made a boo-boo, and last week´s ¨Good Friday¨was in fact, Palm Friday... so Good Friday was yesterday. I had my first bout of homesickness in a church in the middle of Quito yesterday and had a little sob, much to the horror of the people there for mass who thought I´d had some deeply profound religious experience and kept glancing from me to the altar to see what they were missing... thanks to Jamie and Mick I was soon back to my bouncing, coffee-and-Mars-bar seeking self, bouncing around the streets of Quito in the parade and dodging getting spat on and robbed (some bits of South America I won´t miss at all).
But I digress... Now, where did I leave off all that time ago?????
Ahh yes. Soccer in Cuenco and ¨Good Friday¨....
The bus to Riobamba. I was ready to kill myself at the end of it. Ecuadorian men are dirty, sleazy perverts. While I merrily slept, every guy on the bus was staring at my boobs. I thought it was only one, but when I told Moy, he said ¨Well, I didn´t have the heart to tell you, but.....¨
Gross. And when I told our ¨esteemed (not!) leader¨ he said ¨Yep, that´s what we do. Welcome to Ecuador¨. Gross.....
Riobamba (and here I must insert that while I love travelling, I´m just plain tired. I´ve reached that point in travelling where I am exhausted, and need a rest. I need not to carry my bag somewhere or get a bus, so I sound p%ssed off in this rant, but I´m not really. Just tired.) was a bit of a middle of nowhere hole that made Montevideo look good. Big dirty stinking town - wandering past the street eateries was fun though - you can get a piece of animal (the question is what animal... who knows) with rice for about 2 bucks. Bargain. I chose pizza though, as I´m still scarred from the diarrhoea experiences that have plagued me!
Here´s the market in Riobamba......
Then, there was an itinerary change. There was a ¨landslide¨on the train tracks that meant that rather than catch bus and then a train to the Devils Nose, we had to go straight to Banos. Now, I´m smarter than your average punter, so when the next morning a group of fellow travellers got up early to go to the train station to catch the train to Devils Nose, I don´t think you can accuse me of thinking that our ¨esteemed (not!) leader¨might have had some kind of ulterior motive at play. If I was being really cynical, I´d say that the $12US that we were unable to be refunded because of the landslide might be a reason..... Anyway, it put me in the bad mood and now I don´t trust the f&cker any further than I can throw him. His hand on my arse (he´s married) on more than one occasion didn´t help either. I merengued with him once, and that was enough - f&cker said he´d marry me if he wasn´t married.... vile. I´d rather shoot myself in the head with a nail gun.
So, we caught the two hour bus to Banos instead of the Devil´s Nose railway. The two hour bus that went for over three.... With dirty stinking asses and crotches in our faces, and live chickens in sacks on the bus, and crates of fish stowed in the luggage department. And yes, someone staring at my tits for the entire journey. Noice. And no toilet, and with diarrhoea rife through the group..... (yes, I´m tired. Tired, tired, tired.).
Banos was the money shot though. Great little town nestled at the foot of a whole bunch of mountains and active volcanoes. The view up the mountains from the town was great. The fact I had pneumonia meant that I couldn´t partake in rafting or canyoning... which was disappointing. I didn´t want to die though, and I already felt like I could. I was banned, and banished to the town for the afternoon and the following day. Not a bad town for it though - Daylesford meets Hanmer Springs - awesome!
Now. I´m 12 weeks in to my trip, and have spent a lot of time people watching. People are very, very strange creatures and I don´t think I´ll ever work them out. The dutch lady that owns the cafe in Banos is an excellent case study for me to work on my personal goal of understanding people better at the end of my trip. It went like this; Kathryn really, really needed coffee. So, we found a great cafe and had breakfast and coffee. Walk past Dutch lady´s shop and she lays on the hard sell about how great her food is.... We think we made a mistake, so we´ll go there for lunch.
Go back later for lunch. Dutch lady has had personality transplant when it comes to giving us change for a $20. Turns into rancid mole over a $1 bill but insists that we recommend her restaurant to others.
Kathryn doesn´t learn, because Mick wants to go there for breakfast the next day. Dutch lady has been possessed by devil. Kathryn orders scrambled eggs and Dutch lady says she has to have fried same as Mick because she doesn´t have time (ah, excuse me? You work in a cafe? Is there something else you should be doing other than cooking and serving food?). Kathryn is pressured into upgrading juice. Mo joins Mick and Kathryn and orders scrambled eggs, which the lady cooks (!!!!!!).... while Kathryn is trying to enjoy breakfast, fellow patron tries to pay with a $20. Rancid mole possessed by devil has a rant and patron asks Kathryn for change for a $20, which I say I don´t have (having learnt lesson from yesterday, I am keeping change to self). Rancid mole then turns on Kathryn, demanding to know if she will be paying for her breakfast with a $20 as well (which clearly from her hysterical screeching ranted frenzy would be unacceptable) - at which point ¨scathing¨ Kathryn emerged and informed rancid mole that I while I had sufficient change to pay for my breakfast, I did not have change for a $20 and they were two different things.... Mick and Mo looked frightened, so I put my claws away and sucked on my upgraded juice until the rage subsided.....
I then debated with Mick the merits of giving her some feedback on her business practice.... but decided that one valuable lesson of leadership is to pick your battles. Instead, I´m considering starting up a consultancy to businesses and services in tourist areas in South America, as they have a LONG way to go and could be 10,000 times more profitable....
I´m sure when I read back over the above in several weeks I´ll see patterns emerge that I´ll learn from, but for now - I still giggle when I think of that rancid mole standing in front of our bus the next day and one of my fellow travellers who had a similar experience telling the bus to accelerate......
So, while my mates were rapelling and abseiling and jumping off bridges, I was wandering the streets drinking coffee and dealing with rancid moles. Mick and I decided to go to the zoo. Such a lot of fun - Ecuadorian safety standards hard at work, where you can get an arm in the Puma, Jaguar and Ocelot cages, and pretty much touch the monkeys (Hello, Rabies!).
Some pics of Banos......
Now, our ¨esteemed (not!) leader¨ fobbed me off when I asked for some low impact options for the afternoon - given I was coughing up a swimming pool of gunk I decided that taking responsibility for my health and doing something nice for myelf might be a good idea - on the map he pointed out some ¨mud baths¨called ¨El Refujio¨. I pictured myself sinking into a mud bath at the foot of an active volcano, but no..... this is how it went:
1. Arrive at place that was beautiful, but can only be described as hippy haven
2. Choose treatments (mud bath, steam bath, massage - all for $45 Aussie bucks. Heaven).
3. Informed that I need to remove shoes and go for walk around the property before my treatment. Odd, I thinks, but OK.
3. a) spend 10 minutes screaming all my bad thoughts out at El Purgatorio, after walking on sharp jagged rocks for 60m (oh, I had plenty to scream about I can assure you, and when I ran out I even screamed at K.Rudd on behalf of you Sarah regarding the means tested baby bonus).
b) spend 10 minutes walking down a pathway to El Reflectorio and El (let´s move on - can´t remember what it was called). Bizarre...
4. a) Rather than laying back and being covered in warm mud, I had to cover myself in mud....
b) and then do Aerobics Latino style for 30 min covered in mud. I shit you not, my friends... I felt very conspicuous.
5. a) The Steam bath. Finally something normal. This bit was nice. I sat on a little seat in a box of steam, up to my knees in herbs and flowers, just heavenly, while I sipped on herbal tea. Then, the lady opened up the door and threw two bucket of icy cold water over me. What. A. Shock. After rinsing and repeating several times...
6. The massage. OK, so maybe there was something in the preparation, because it was a truly awesome experience and I´ve never felt so good at the end of it!
Fortunately we all agreed to hiring a private van the next morning for the trip to the Amazon Jungle, which meant some fun stop offs along the way. There was bungee for those inclined....
... and waterfalls....
Then the Amazon jungle... Awesome setting, on the river, in bungalows. No malaria! Bonus!
Great, until I woke at 3am with a beetle the size of a giant Cherry Ripe on my neck. I felt something so I grabbed at my neck half asleep, and then I had it in my hand.... What to do with it then? Throw it on the floor, of course. It took me 20min of deep breathing to look - I could hear it tap, tap, tapping it´s broken legged way along the floor, and I thought for sure it was a tarantula.... Phew. Dodged a bullet there. Did see a dead one at breakfast though - makes our tiny hairy huntsmans look tame....
The next day was checking out locals and jungle cruising....
....and drinking the locally made chicha (made from yuca - at least they don´t chew it up anymore, they use a pestle to grind it - it´s rude not to drink some, so I was thankful for this small mercy).....
...and gorgeous Squirrel monkeys. I was particularly taken with these little guys!
Check out the size of the banana compared to the monkey - they were tiny!
.....and we arrived just after the baby boom, so we got to see some little ones.....
We went on a night jungle walk - no tarantulas, but did see a scorpion, and lots of these little guys (still huge though!).
Then, another local bus to Quito. Quito, one of the most dangerous cities in South America - way to go out of the country with a bang!
Gorgeous, winding streets with a Salzburg feel.....
Quito... framed by mountains and sugarcube houses....
Yesterday was Good Friday, and seeing a parade in one of the most Catholic places in the world was awe inspiring. Hooded men, Jesus´s and the self-flagellating (yes, there were men whipping themselves up and down the street) all walked through the streets of Quito in celebration (?).
Meanwhile, we were getting spat on and pick-pocketed. The joys.....
The equator and solar museum nearby was a lot of fun, here I am, straddling the centre of the earth.....
....and this guy wasn´t keen on lending me his chaps, but he himself makes for a great pic.....
And here´s the traditional dress of a fine jungle warrior. This is the swimming costume used for fishing (see the string? Quite necessary when you think about piranhas)... the rest of the time, they were naked!
Here´s some pics from earlier I was unable to post until now.....
Just to prove that there were some happy Ecuadorian moments.....
Enjoying the Fanesca (12 grain soup with smoked cod- meant to represent the 12 apostles) on Good, I mean Palm, Friday.....
A crowded bus trip in Zorritos, Peru.....
Anyway, all good things must come to an end, and at 4am tomorrow morning it´s farewell South America, and time to start spreading the news.... I´m leaving today.... for New York City.
Top 5 things I won´t miss about South America....
1. Diarrhoea. But, can get that anywhere I guess.
2. Fear for my personal safety. Ditto......
3. The traffic - oh that´s right, I´m going to Cairo, worst city in the world for traffic... better get over that one too...
4. Chickens on public buses - oh that´s right, I´m going to Asia. Again, must get over that one....
5. No Aqua Caliente. Damn, hot showers are few and far between in the Middle East.....
Hmmm. I must be tired!
5 things I will miss about South America:
1. Travelling up and down from sea level to 5000m in one day - from 40 C tropics to the bare high plains to ice capped mountains and snow in -5 C and then back to the heat...... Awesome views and amazing contrasts....
2. The jungle. Didn´t spend enough time there. It was cool.
3. Hiking. Never thought I´d love it as much as I do.
4. Speaking Spanish with locals. I think I´ve invented my own phrases but last night when I said to crazy Taxi Driver #879 ¨no quisiera muerte por favor¨ he knew I meant ¨Please, I don´t want to die¨. And slowed down.
5. My buddies! Jamie, Mick, Moy, Sarah, Dan and Sean were the best travel buddies a girl could have!! And last night I finally snapped my always-fabulous, sometimes-roommate, the lovely-Sarah-lady looking au naturel....
The first five things I´m going to do in NYC:
1. Sleep. In the city that never sleeps. Ha ha ha.
2. Coffee. Even Starbucks looks good after what I´ve been through in Ecuador.
3. Eyebrow wax. Too terrified to get one here. Think Rose Porteous.
4. Read an English newspaper. Anything, even US Today would be fine with me...
5. Walk around, in broad daylight, with every valuable possession I own on my person - just because I can....
So, until my next update from North America, Happy Easter! Ame a todos!
No comments:
Post a Comment